"The things that I've loved,
The things that I've lost,
The things I've held sacred that I've dropped"
These lyrics have been on repeat in my head (Audioslave, Doesn't Remind Me, btw)
Considering more and more how we're creatures of change and flux, adjustment and readjustment
All in a bid to return to homeostasis and maintain balance after a bit of chaos
The vessel taking in and letting out
This seems to be how I learn and grow
Life-chaos-readjustment-integration
The versions of ourselves that have existed over time are part of a remarkable evolution
Even though we shift who we are while working through this life, it's beautiful that fragments of self stick around
I was dipping into memories the other day with @brandon.of.bjerke and reminding myself of the feelings I had watching Dirty Dancing
When I was Bea's age it was my favorite movie (along with Ghostbusters!)
I have very warm memories of watching the scene when Baby brings the watermelon to the staff party 👌❤ when "Love Man" from Otis Redding drops, there is literally nothing better
That little bit of chaos in the system changed Baby and really set her on the path toward liberation and self-ownership
Child to woman or innocence to experience
Those feelings are bound to my DNA in some wild way that I can drop into them and feel the purity and rawness when I listen to that song
Despite being 34 years separated from 3 year old me, there is so much overlap
Scary as it might be because I fuck up all the time, but parenting is truly the most significant job
Some of the things I model now and some of the experiences Bea will have will stick around regardless of all the upgrades to her system (heart, spirit, emotion, mind)
No matter how much we change, there are parts of us that are the same
Anyway, here is a midnight collage of Francis "Baby" Houseman and all the lovely things that came through when dipping into HER legacy and my own Hebrew lines
Life bursting forward with Baby the Goddess, bowing at the foot of her altar
Things I still hold sacred
