Celiac Disease and psychedelics: I spent a number of years sick and a number of years attempting to get better once I figured out my diagnosis
It's truly amazing the physical and psychological toll living with an autoimmune disease can have
I buried the pain so deeply in my body it took a very long time to root it out
I spent so much time distrusting my body-- feeling as if it was failing me and literally hell-bent on killing me from the inside out
After dropping 30lbs one summer, I was living with ongoing diarrhea and having neurological issues, there was only one doctor (out of many i went to) who believed my symptoms and then tested my guts absorption
Not having much guidance in the early days, I really took ownership of my failings and wallowed in the shame around "disease"
When every single thing you put in your body has the potential to either heal you or hurt you, you really start to bow down in the face of it all
I started welcoming psychedelics into my life when I was 18 and began really using it as a tool for deeper work in my early 20s
I remember during a few sessions with mushrooms I was brought into the pit of my gut and shown the stacks and stacks of proverbial shit I had in there
All of the attachments to my pain and shame from doctors telling me my problem was in my head was stored there alongside the literal shit
I could feel the mushrooms guiding me back to myself, allowing me to release the gut knots, and reminding me to trust that EVOLUTION has brought me here just by showing me the story
This really helped me understand on a much more realistic level that if we're not actively honest and processing our feelings/experiences our body will certainly keep score
My gut was the site of so much warfare
Even while I was healing-- years after being gluten free-- I still held on to the tightness of my pain in the folds on my intestines
Being able to work with a medicine that was able to show me this was something I needed
It showed me how to shed and that it was okay to release my gut from the grips of my trauma
I slowly unwound and found a new center of balance
And a support system to digest the food AND the feelings around the food
